Bits & Pieces

The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told (Part 3)

COULD IT GET ANY STRANGER?!?

Spiders! Rumplestiltskin! Pac-Man! Werewolves! What do these creatures and characters have in common? They’re all mentioned in the third part of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told! Take your medicine.  (9/4/06)

Genesis of the Homemade Daleks: Part 2!

HOMEMADE DALEKS: PART 2

And after a long month of waiting, Skaro-Crayon returns with Genesis of the Homemade Daleks: Part 2! If you’ve ever wanted a nifty Dalek figure that opened up to reveal the fearsome Kaled mutant within, read on.  (8/30/06)

The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told (Part 2)

TEH STRANGENESS CONTINUES!!!

Yessiree, it’s time for the second engaging installment of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told. If you like reading odd and oddly insightful rambling nonsense, friends, you’ve come to the right place!  (8/19/06)

''A Special News Report!''

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #85!

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #85! is terrible, but don’t you dare pretend that you’ve never wondered if it would be possible! Especially if you’re familiar with the Teen Titans comics. The Changeling is a freaky freak.  (8/19/06)

''tonight I feel like dying''

Crayon Poetry Corner #13!

It’s been a while since we’ve had an installment of Crayon Poetry Corner, eh? From the less ostensibly cheerful side of SC, here’s a new piece from Wes entitled “tonight I feel like dying”. Four stanzas of misery.  (8/17/06)

The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told (Part 1)

PH33R TEH STRANGENESS

Remember that zany 50K-word novel I wrote in ’04? Well, I’ve decided to post the whole thing — in 14 or so chunks — for your reading pleasure! Here’s the first part of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told.  (8/17/06)

Hip Hop Locos...

HIP HOP LOCOS IS AWFUL.

If you’ve ever wanted to experience a night on the town with two pot-smoking thugs who say “ey” and “esse” and “holmes” about eight billion times per sentence, Hip Hop Locos is the film for you! I despised this movie.  (8/7/06)

Genesis of the Homemade Daleks: Part 1!

HOMEMADE DALEKS: PART 1

Dalekmania continues on Scary-Crayon with a rare arts ‘n’ crafts feature: Genesis of the Homemade Daleks: Part 1! Join us for one (mostly) kid-friendly method of creating a 3″ Dalek. In part 2, we’ll explore another!  (7/26/06)

YOU WILL BE EXTERMINATED!!!

YOU WILL BE EXTERMINATED!!!

Readers beware — the Daleks have returned! This time, Scary-Crayon reviews three games featuring everyone’s favorite salt shaker-shaped cyborg mutant things. Also, it is forbidden to dump bodies into the river.  (7/17/06)

Recreate this dish at your peril.

STRAWBERRIES + EGGS = 666

No, we’re not dead — but given the events documented herein, our survival may surprise some readers. Curious? Read on to learn about the monstrosity born of the unholy combination of strawberries… and eggs.  (7/12/06)

''All About Superman Yes Yes Yes.''

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #84!

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #84 is intended to be more of a commentary on nerd identity and behavior in general, but I focused the dialogue on Superman because of the recent release of his latest film. Yes yes yes.  (7/12/06)

''Her body was bangin'.''

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #83!

I don’t know about you, but “conversations” like the one depicted in Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #83 fucking make my head hurt. WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF THESE KINDS OF STORIES??? I hate my life.  (6/27/06)

Happy Father's Day, Buraiking Boss!

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY, BK BOSS!!!

And no, that doesn’t stand for Burger King! For this year’s annual Father’s Day tribute, we honor Buraiking Boss — the principal protagonist of the Casshan animes and the 2004 live action film. All hail Buraiking!  (6/18/06)

EXTERMINATE!!!

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #82!

And Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #82 marks the first appearance of DALEKS on Scary-Crayon. Don’t you wish you lived in a stylish hydrant thingy with shiny balls and lasers and outdated speech software? I do.  (6/11/06)

Chinese-Canadian PlayStation Imports!

CHINESE-CANADIAN IMPORTS!!!

Chinatowns often contain trange things, but obscure used games are not typically found there… except in Canada. In this article, we review three import PSX games uncovered during a 2002 trip to our Northern neighbor.  (5/25/06)

A Crayon Haiku #51!

A Crayon Haiku #51!

I can’t read Japanese text, but that doesn’t stop Eastern robots from sending me spam in their native language! At least I think it’s spam. Why not have a look at A Crayon Haiku #51 and tell me what you think, eh?  (5/18/06)

The February 2002 Cosmopolitan Review!

COSMOPOLITAN IS TERRIBLE.

Here at Scary-Crayon, we occasionally come under fire for reviewing things that weren’t meant for us, but that hasn’t stopped us yet! Today, our proud tradition continues with a look at the February 2002 issue of Cosmo.  (5/18/06)

Street Fighter II on the PC!

STREET FIGHTER II, PC STYLE!!!

At long last (!!!), Scary-Crayon examines several early PC incarnations of Street Fighter II. Sure, these games look like the Capcom classic, but how do they compare in the gameplay department? Read on to find out!  (5/8/06)