Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #55!

Prehistoric gods rule the earth once more as the Primal Rage combatants return to Scary-Crayon in Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #55! But instead of battling the Turtles, this time they encounter... the living dead.  (10/25/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #52!

And all is right with the world as Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #52 finally makes its perverted appearance! On the other hand, maybe this comic is decisive proof that all is not right with the world. You be the judge...  (10/21/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #54!

Place your bets, kids, 'cause it's Raphael versus The Yeti in Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #54! And why the hell is Raph battling a yeti, you ask? Probably the same reason Leo's facing off against a freaking T-Rex.  (10/18/05)

Protégé de la Rose Noire, Part 2!

And now, Scary-Crayon presents the second and final part of our Protégé de la Rose Noire review! Watch in awe as the random and seemingly pointless stuff from the first part actually proves useful in the final battle.  (10/15/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #53!

Hey, it's Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #53! And shouldn't we be on #52? Yes! But sometimes we like to post out of order. Anyway, perhaps you've heard about the snake that ate the alligator! This is the prologue.  (10/11/05)

Protégé de la Rose Noire, Part 1!

Yes, Virginia, that guy is dressed up as Robin -- and that's hardly the craziest thing that Protégé de la Rose Noire has to offer. Insanity and violence abound in the first of this two-part Scary-Crayon film review!  (10/7/05)

HELL NOOOOO NURSE!

In a time of sickness and disease, Scary-Crayon boldly asks, "Where have all the sexy nurses gone?" Join us as we explore the discrepancies between the ideal nurse and the sad reality in Hell Nooooo NURSE!  (10/4/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #51!

And we're kicking off October with a new Hot Flash from the Dusty Plastic HELL! In this comic, we check out the forgotten SNES game Tuff E Nuff for a look at desperation moves in the apocalyptic distant future.  (10/4/05)

SPIDER-MAN IS GROSS.

Look out -- here comes the Spider-Man! And come he does, spewing semen all over NYC and its citizens. In this article, we examine the evidence for and implications of the disturbing reality that Spider-Man is gross.  (9/30/05)

BEWARE THE SURVEY BEAST.

Lacking employment and lacking funds, young Wesley braved the infernal realm of paid surveys to make some money for Scary-Crayon. Succeed he did -- but at what cost? The paid survey path is paved with terror.  (9/27/05)

WELCOME TO FUTURELAND.

It's time for another Scary-Crayon book review! Step into Walter Mosley's Futureland, a collection of sci-fi tales that deal with race in the immediate future. There's quite a bit of serious commentary in this one, too.  (9/22/05)

Tales of Seduction by U-Jin, Part 3!

In the final installment of our Tales of Seduction by U-Jin review, we see a love quadrangle involving two workers, their boss, and his daughter -- and the return of Toyama no Benbei! I wouldn't read it at work, though.  (9/19/05)

BATMAN'S DAD WAS AN ASSHOLE.

Everyone's always pretended that Thomas Wayne was a great man -- but, in truth, the guy was an asshole. He beat his son; he beat his wife; he tried to beat those crooks but they shot him first. He got what he deserved. (9/13/05)

CHOCOLATE COVERED CRICKETS.

That's right, folks -- courtesy of Fluker Farm, Scary-Crayon delves further into the realm of distastefulness to review chocolate covered crickets. Wanna know the nutritional value of a single oven-roasted cricket? Read on.  (9/8/05)

A Crayon Haiku #33!

It's been a while, but the wait is over -- Scary-Crayon's longest running featurette returns from summer vacation with A Crayon Haiku #33! Here, we meet "Geneshaft"'s Mir Lotus: "The person with perfect DNA."  (9/5/05)

I'd rather watch EL OJO ROJO!!!

Wes Craven's Red Eye debuted last weekend to pretty good reviews from a number of credible sources, but I'm not going to see it because the teaser trailer fucking lied to me. The movie I wanted to see? El Ojo Rojo.  (8/27/05)

WELCOME TO CRAYONCON!!!

So we missed out on the annual local anime convention this week, but to fill the void we started our own fun-filled fest: CRAYONCON! Join us as we get drunk, enjoy faux sashimi, review anime-related food items.  (8/22/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #50!

I dunno how funny Bruce Bruce is when he's not making lame jokes about how much he likes fried chicken, but these new Popeye's ads are fucking terrible. Someone should be shot for writing this material.  (8/22/05)