MARGARITA CHICKEN ...IN A BUN!!!

THEY'RE BACK!!! Scary-Crayon continues its mad quest to review the manifold varieties of Forkless Gourmet Bun Meals in this brief assessment of their Margarita Chicken offering. Also featuring NINJA BOBBLEHEAD!  (8/15/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #49!

At work, one of the questions I've heard quite a bit lately is "How do I get to the second floor?" Seriously! So read on to learn the answer to that very question in this latest Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash installment.  (8/15/05)

FANTASTIC FOUR Z CARDZ!

In this late movie tie-in, Scary-Crayon reviews Fantastic Four Z Cardz -- the cardz that turn into 3-D models! And they kinda suck, but what do you expect for thirty cents? Also included: A bonus comic-style adventure!  (8/8/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #48!

There are so many things wrong with this comic. Created by ST@N from two earlier pieces, Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #48 sees the return of Clara the pregnant vegetable and the Feaster Bunny. It's too bloody much.  (8/8/05)

Tales of Seduction by U-Jin, Part 2!

In part two of our Tales of Seduction by U-Jin review, we meet Toyama no Benbei, the smoothest hired rapist ever! WARNING: This piece may not be work-safe! There's no graphic nudity, but there are questionable ethics!  (8/2/05)

The Experimental OYSTER LOAF!

Reputed to be an aphrodisiac, oysters are sought after for both their delectable taste and their purported ability to make limp things hard. Which has nothing to do with why we want to make OYSTER LOAF, but still.  (7/28/05)

FUCK YOU, HARRY POTTER.

Last weekend, folks across the globe rushed out to buy the latest Harry Potter book with reckless abandon. At Scary-Crayon, however, we did nothing of the sort! 'Cause you know what we say? Fuck Harry Potter.  (7/22/05)

BATMAN: JUSTICE UNBALANCED!!!

Look out! Two-Face and Penguin are on the move, and it's up to Batman and Robin to stop them! But how does this educational PC adventure fare? Find out as Scary-Crayon reviews BATMAN: Justice Unbalanced!  (7/18/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #47!

If you read the funnies, perhaps you've seen the comic strip Jump Start -- in which, for the past two or so weeks, the antics of two talking unborn twins have been featured. And you know what? It's not fucking funny.  (7/14/05)

Tales of Seduction by U-Jin, Part 1!

Wanna see teenage girls fucked by a creepy songwriter? You're in luck! Enter U-Jin's Tales of Seduction, the first of a three-part SC review! WARNING: This article may not be entirely work-safe! Read at your own risk.  (7/11/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #46!

George A. Romero's Land of the Dead recently hit the theaters -- and if you haven't seen it, you should definitely go do that! But riddle me this, Batman: Why is the hottest woman in the movie... a zombie? Seriously!  (7/8/05)

JULY 4th, SCARY-CRAYON STYLE!

Yep, Scary-Crayon's here in the final minutes of July 4th with its own holiday tribute -- basically an article about the foods with which we marked the day. Nothing special, but it does involve dollar store turkey franks.  (7/4/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #45!

Man, what happened to summer being a time for fun and relaxation? Recent news reports would have you believe otherwise! So here's Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #45, based on recent events in Florida. Be careful...  (6/30/05)

A Crayon Haiku #32!

And it's time for another digression into the land of things strange and gross with A Crayon Haiku #32! Seriously, if you can't stand the sight of RED RED BLOOD, this one's not for you. Don't say I didn't warn you!  (6/23/05)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #44!

Beware, inhabitants of the frozen corners of the earth, for the TERRIBLE PANDA SEAL reveals itself in Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #44! You may think that it's cute, but the panda seal feeds on... well, you'll see.  (6/23/05)

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, M. BISON!

It's (almost) Father's Day, which means it's time for another Scary-Crayon tribute piece! This year's honoree? M. Bison! True, Bison didn't even have any kids, but he was still a father in more ways than one.  (6/18/05)

Crayon Poetry Corner #12!

Unless you're under 21 or a teetotaler, you probably know what happens when you drink a long island iced tea. Do you know what happens after quickly gulping down four of 'em? Find out in Crayon Poetry Corner #12!  (6/13/05)

IN SEARCH OF THE WHITE BONE.

Alright, class, it's book report time! Here, Scary-Crayon reviews Barbara Gowdy's The White Bone, a sad and thought-provoking novel about a herd of African savannah elephants in search of a mystical artifact.  (6/10/05)