Bits & Pieces

WHAT THE HECK IS IT???

A Crayon Haiku #13!

Yup! Hope you’re hungry, ’cause it’s time for A Crayon Haiku #13. Yes, how very perceptive of you — this one’s out of order. Oh, don’t look so shocked. You’re browsing a site called Scary-Crayon, remember?  (3/22/04)

Crayon Poetry Corner #1.

Crayon Poetry Corner #1!

Here, Scary-Crayon expands its poetic scope with the introduction of a new featurette: Crayon Poetry Corner. Taking the stage, Wes submits “macabre asylum eight” for your enjoyment. With a crayon illustration.  (3/22/04)

Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?

THE MADBALLS DO HISTORY!!!

The Madballs finally come home to Scary-Crayon in this review of The Madballs History of the World. Sure, there’s no way you can handle it, but have a look anyway. Puritans have more fun, you know.  (3/19/04)

BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE!!!

A Crayon Haiku #7!

It most certainly is! Come along, come along, dear reader, and be merry, for A Crayon Haiku #7 is upon us! We’re a little late for St. Patrick’s Day, but Beetlejuice is still wearing his green pants…  (3/16/04)

Random ingredients!

A RANDOM LUNCH #1!!!

Randomness returns to Scary-Crayon with A Random Lunch #1. This time, cooking with ingredients that don’t belong together results in the production of familiar things (!) …that also don’t belong together.  (3/16/04)

The Wizard of Oz!

WIZARD OF OZ GAME REVIEW!!!

Well, it had to happen sometime. In this very first video game review, Scary-Crayon ventures into the wonderful world of Oz as seen on the Super Nintendo. Only Oz isn’t half as wonderful as it used to be…  (3/12/04)

April seems to be missing...

WHERE’S APRIL????

Where’s April? Good frickin’ question! Read on to find out the answer in this first Scary-Crayon essay offering. And then join Leonardo as he embarks on a quest to recover April O’Neil for the glory of SC.  (3/9/04)

i'm lovin' it...?

A MCDONDALD’S CUP REVIEW!!!

This time, Scary-Crayon reviews a McDonald’s cup. Not a Happy Meal, not the toy that comes with the Happy Meal, not a food item, not the beverage in the cup — the cup itself. Just the bloody cup. Bloody hell.  (3/5/04)

A Crayon Haiku #6!

A Crayon Haiku #6!

Finally having come down from the incredible high that is THE SANDWICH SO WEIRD it frightens McGriddles, Napoleon’s back to his old tricks in A Crayon Haiku #6! What do they entail? Read and find out!  (3/1/04)

Ugh.

AND IT’S TORTURE TIME AGAIN.

Yep, Scary-Crayon once again delves into the horrors of “O, the Oprah Magazine”. Well, not exactly “into” — this time we’ve only reviewed the cover of the December 2003 issue. Just the cover. Still horrible.  (3/1/04)

Starring a Triceraton...!

A Crayon Haiku #5!

That’s right — y’all gather ’round for A Crayon Haiku #5. In this installment, Scary-Crayon takes a look at the character of the noble Triceraton. These descriptions are longer than the haikus themselves.  (2/24/04)

BOOTLEG E.T.!!!

Christmas Memory Filler Stuff!!!

Yep, it’s time for a short filler article that puppeteers you by your heartstrings with Scary-Crayon’s sappy special Christmas Memory Filler Stuff. I challenge you to read it without saying, “Awwww…” at least once. ;P  (2/24/04)

''Fo' shizzle, ma nizzle!''

CREEPY FREAKS CARTOON!!!

In the mood for something kinda…strange? Well relax with the extra special image-packed in-depth two-part Creepy Freaks Animation Episode Review! Over 6,600 words of pure unbridled lunacy. And yogurt.  (2/21/04)

Starring Hordak!

DUSTY PLASTIC HELL #2!!!

Yep, THE TOYS ARE BACK in Dusty Plastic HELL #2! This time we visit with some of the less fortunate members of the SC toy family. Come inside, dear reader, and hearken to their tales of woe…  (2/17/04)

What is it? Find out inside!

A Crayon Haiku #4!

Just in time for Valentine’s Day comes A Crayon Haiku #4, with two haikus for the price of one! The action figures have taken V-Day off to recite bad poetry, but there’s always strange food to write about…  (2/14/04)

Behold...the weirdness...!

RUN, MCGRIDDLES, RUN!!!

Return to the kitchen with Scary-Crayon to learn the secrets of THE SANDWICH SO WEIRD it frightens McGriddles. Napoleon Bonafrog, Baxter Stockman, and Zoltan demonstrate the esoteric cooking rites.  (2/11/04)

Tokka and Slash!

A Crayon Haiku #3!

Yep, it’s time for the third edition of A Crayon Haiku! Tokka and Slash star, along with the author’s mounting suspicion that there’s something odd going on that he can’t quite comprehend…  (2/9/04)

Starring Wild Boar Alien and Kain!

A RANDOM LUNCH #0!!!

Welcome to the first installment of another Scary-Crayon feature, A Random Lunch #0! In this “prequel” of sorts, Wild Boar Alien and Kain encounter something so wrong that they are moved to violence…  (2/7/04)