Latest Additions

He's not fucking into you.
Having trouble figuring out whether that man in your life is truly interested? Forget He's Just Not Into You -- turn to Scary-Crayon's He's Not Fucking Into You for the answers! A must-read for women everywhere.  (10/13/04)

R.I.P. Rodney Dangerfield
On October 5, 2004, one of the funniest men who ever lived passed away. Join Scary-Crayon as we salute the comic legend Rodney Dangerfield with this special edition of Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash.  (10/08/04)

''Filthy Camels''
Observant as he is, Wes sees many depressing things in his travels -- for instance, dirty bastards who spit on the sidewalk for no fucking reason. Instead of killing them, he wrote this poem. "Filthy Camels" is the title.  (10/08/04)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #2!
In Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #2, we find that at least one of the Turtles enjoys eating something other than pizza. Well! This "Hot Flash" segment name is turning out to be more appropriate than we'd intended.  (10/04/04)

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #1!
Enter Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #1, the first edition of Scary-Crayon's new webcomic-style featurette. In this first installment, we take a look at a magazine cover mockup based on an upcoming film...  (9/29/04)

A Crayon Haiku #17!
As if you didn't already know, A Crayon Haiku #17 shows that we at Scary-Crayon never paid much attention to our moms when they told us not to play with our food. What's that, Mom? I can't hear you.  (9/29/04)

Bloody hell.
In this didactic offering, Leatherhead and Donatello go over a few netiquette rules that everyone who browses the web should know. You'd think they'd be obvious... but apparently not everyone does. Think, that is.  (9/24/04)

What horrors lurk in A Random Lunch #7???
The talking action figures make a triumphant return to Scary-Crayon in A Random Lunch #7! Join Leatherhead, the Turtlebot, and Foodstuffs veteran Wyrm as they combine edible ingredients in eldritch ways.  (9/20/04)

A Crayon Haiku: Times Square Toys ''R'' Us Edition!
After taking a week off to check out NEW YAWK CITY, Scary-Crayon returns with A Crayon Haiku: Times Square Toys ''R'' Us Edition! It's a quick look at the store's interior. With haikus! And the jawsome T-Rex.  (9/14/04)

Tonight I dine on TURTLE SPEW!!!
Shredder's always craved turtle soup, and tonight he'll finally get to eat... wait, that's not soup! And there aren't any turtles in it. But it is green. And delicious. And alcoholic! It's Turtle Spew!!! Come get some.  (9/03/04)

THE SANDWICH THAT PETRIFIES THE GODS.
Yes, Virginia, even the gods get scared sometimes. And lo! Scary-Crayon's culinary research team has discovered one such source of divine terror in THE SANDWICH THAT PETRIFIES THE GODS. It's bloody amazing.  (9/03/04)

In A Crayon Haiku #16, Skeletor gets reacquainted with some old friends from the 80s -- or so he thinks. Once the truth is revealed, how will he react to these unfamiliar faces? There's only one way to find out!  (9/03/04)

What is Scary-Crayon? Glad you asked!

Scary-Crayon (dot com) is an internet chronicle of random crap, similar to X-Entertainment, I-Mockery, Encyclopedia Obscura, and Ice Anvil Online, to name a few. There are others, of course (see the links!), because there's a lot of random crap out there, and no one site (or even a handful of sites) could hope to cover all of it. We're just doing our part to help. :)

Scary-Crayon is maintained by Wes (::waves:: personal page coming soon uh, whenever... in the meantime, try reading my blog), with guest pieces from Megami (see Meighan.com, currently hibernating), Jax, and perhaps other contributors in the future. So unless you're replying directly to Megami or Jax regarding one of their pieces -- or you wish to profess your undying love for our sexy guest writers -- all inquiries, comments, criticisms, praises, DONATIONS, and the like regarding Scary-Crayon, etc., should be sent to Wes. C'mon -- don't be shy! Crayons don't bite. At least, normal ones don't...

Anyway, I hope you enjoy Scary-Crayon. Send an e-mail, let us know what you think. And y'all come back now, y'hear? :)

-- Wes --
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