January 15, 2007
Triple-Team-Up: The Best and Worst of 2006!

Best and worst type articles are admittedly pretty common, but we’ve never done one here at Scary-Crayon before now — so I’m especially glad that my pals Greg of Pop Arena and Molly of Alligator Juice were willing to play along and participate in this triple-team-up feature. I’m really pleased with how diverse the lists turned out, too. Greg’s article draws upon his experiences as a Target employee, Molly’s selections are influenced by her status as a card-carrying televisiophile, and our own contribution is pretty long-winded and all over the place… just like much of the site. 😛

I’ve also tried to practice some of my new image editing techniques in this one, so hopefully you’ll be seeing more of the same in 2007. I’m particularly pleased with the way the Dalek came out — the pic in the article is a photo of the actual bath and shower gel container. (I used an orange background to make it easier to isolate the dome lights and the discs on the eyestalk; you can sort of see the color reflected on the Dalek’s base.) You might be able to get a better deal on eBay (I did), but you can also order your own Dalek bath and shower gel at Who North America. Personally — although it would hurt me to drop the $50; you can kinda tell how frugal/cheap I am from reading this article — I’m now leaning towards purchasing this Dalek. This one is also pretty neat, though. And of course there are the micro Daleks. I sure like Daleks. :mrgreen:

All for now, then — thanks for reading, and do check out Molly and Greg’s pieces as well. Again, we wish you all the best in 2007… whatever you are. That’s a Count Duckula reference, btw.

P.S. Scary-Crayon’s three-year anniversary is just ten days away! I may not have anything fantastic to post on it, but still. Mark your calendars! Donate generous sums of money! Or just keep reading and making the occasional comment that doesn’t make my head hurt. No matter which avenue you choose, your support will be greatly appreciated. 🙂

-posted by Wes | 6:30 pm | Comments (11)
  • Molly says:

    This update was a lot of fun! I learned many thing. I also didn’t realize, until this very moment, how many of my choices WERE TV-related. Odd!

  • agustinaldo says:

    1-Doesn’t Oprah talk and act like a black version of Dr. Laura?

    Remember her?

    Dr. Laura was ALSO a self-centered, egostitical nazi bitch with her owntalk ashow.

    That thing Oprah did with the poor insane guy? That’s just a regular episode of “Dr. Laura”

    2-You have to remember that there are A LOT of Disney fanboys that will dispute all of your viewings just because you dare to attack their beloved Disneyness.

    You should stop by the imdb boards, there are entire armies of Hillary Duff, Lindsay Lohan and Olsen Twins fanboys.

    And I don’t want this to become a personal attack, but I feel towards “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”and the morons who watch that show (and idolize Sarah Michelle Gellar and Joss Whedon, the two most hideous things mankind has ever created) the same way you feel about “That’s So Raven”.

    3-About the Takaashi Miike thing: I know. Oh boy, do I know.

    I’m SO sick and tired of so-called “horror” movies that use a shower of blood and guts instead of actual scares. It isn’t scary or horryfing in the least, it’s just gross and disgusting.

    “Hostel”, “Creep”, “Reeker”, “House of 1000 Corpses”, “Haute Tension”, they are all the same inane, non-scary crap.

    What happened to gore-less, sunspensful, SCARY horror movies like “Halloween”, “Psycho”, “The Exorcist”, “The Thing” or “Dracula”?

    4-If you like Venom so much, you HAVE to go see “Spider-Man 3”, as Venom is one of the main villains.

    Topher Grace is playing him.

    5-I also urge you to go rent the “Pirates of the Caribbean” movies.

    They have zombie pirates, sea-creature ghost pirates, sea monsters, hot teenage witches, and the coolest character ever to grace the screen: Captain Jack Sparrow.

    6-Can’t you just ask your sister to give you Bacardi as your pet?

    7-As ideas for future articles:

    -you could do an article on us, the macriophiles.

    In case you don’t know, we are people who get excited and/or sexually aroused when watching giant women, or watching women grow.

    I can give you helpful links for you to research.

    -you could do an article on McFarlane’s Movie Maniacs toys

    -you could do an article trashing “The FairlyOddParents”.

    If you are looking for a stupid, inane show to bash, look no further

    -you could do an article comparing all tenth incarnations of The Doctor, saying which is your favorite and which is the worst

    -you could do an article about Argentininian culture.

    The comic books “Sherlock Time”, “El Eternauta”, “Boogie el Aceitoso”, “Mort Cinder”, “Patoruzu” and “Mafalda”, Marcelo Tinelli, TV shows like “Videomatch”, “Titanes en el Ring” and “Casados con Hijos” or people like Luciana SAlazar or Fernando Pe?a…

  • Wes says:

    Agreed, Mols — this was a fun update, and have I mentioned how pleased I am with the variety of our lists? We should definitely do something like this again in the future. 🙂

    Responses to your numbered comments, agustin:

    1.) Never saw Dr. Laura, so I have no idea how similar she is to Oprah. I also find something about your comment to be kind of offensive (well, not so much offensive as depressing), but I’m not going to get into that right now.

    2.) I don’t really have anything against “That’s So Raven” fans as a rule. The show is stupid, but it’s pretty inoffensive and I wouldn’t mind watching an episode or two if I were bored and couldn’t find anything better to watch. It’s the mindless fans (like the ones who commented on that article) that bug me — but I have a problem with these kinds of people in any fandom, Buffy included. I really like seasons 2-5, but I maintain that 1 is sort of lacking (despite having a few good episodes) and that 6 and 7 are shit — and you wouldn’t believe how many people have called me a “bad fan” or otherwise criticized me for my dislike of the latter seasons.

    I also don’t worship Sarah Michelle Gellar or Joss Whedon. Actually, I think that SMG is kind of a bitch (I’m kinda ticked off that she’ll be voicing April) and that Whedon is extremely overrated. Later seasons of Buffy and Angel kinda sucked; Serenity was good — in the sense that “good” is just slightly better than “okay” — but I wouldn’t buy the DVD for more than $6 or rewatch it on a regular basis. Anyway, rambling, but the mindless devotees kinda piss me off too.

    3.) I haven’t seen any of the new films that you mentioned, but I personally don’t think that any of the old films that you mentioned are really scary. At any rate, I don’t mind the blood and guts so much as I mind the attitude behind them. You can play blood and guts for laughs and make it work; you can use them to illustrate a point by way of metaphor or provide contrast and make it work; but showing blood and guts simply for the sake of showing blood and guts is kind of boring. Miike’s not so much into the blood and guts as he is into torture and rape and dead babies, though.

    4.) Yeah, I know, and I think Topher Grace is a terrible choice for Venom. Dude’s not even buff! But I’ll probably see the movie anyway (even though I think it will kind of suck) because I thought Spider-Man 2 was just phenomenal.

    5.) Someday.

    6.) I really do like Bacardi a lot, but I don’t want to keep him. He shits too much.

    7A.) I’m not doing any articles on sexual fetishes. I could see maybe touching on the subject in a snarky aside of a review of something like “Colorful” — or even making a joke about it in a Hot Flash using the 12″ Venom (I have no 12″ female figures) — but otherwise that’s totally not the kind of article I would write. Sorry!

    7B.) McFarlane’s Movie Maniacs toys are fucking expensive, so I’m just not that into them. I have a Candyman figure that I got for like $3 discounted (which is cool, because Candyman is one of my favorite horror films), but that’s about it.

    I will write about them if you send me some, though! Actually, that goes for pretty much anything — I’d review a pamphlet on macrophilia if a fan mailed me a physical copy.

    7C.) I’d find it hard to trash “The Fairly Oddparents”, actually. Yes, it’s a goofy, goofy cartoon, but it never pretends to be anything else. It’s not touted as being educational or (as far as I know) commenting on any social issues — it’s just wacky. I’ve got nothing against that.

    7D.) I could, but the only people who would know what I was talking about are people who are already familiar with “Doctor Who” and the merits of the various Doctors. I suppose I could do a snarky take on each one, but then I’d have Whofans who would completely miss the joke and bombard me with e-mails and comments to correct me and whatnot. So if you’re interested in the answers, I’ll just go ahead and say that I cannot stand Colin Baker’s Doctor (he’s such an asshole), but that I find Peter Davison’s to be the most charming and endearing. Except for C. Baker’s and McGann’s versions, though, I’ve sort of liked pretty much all of the Doctors.

    7E.) That would be neat, except I’m not interested enough in Argentinian culture offhand to actually research the subject at length. (No offense!) It would be different if I were, say, visiting Argentina — the article would be less about the culture than my experiences in Argentina, but still — but what I write is always pretty much connected to what I’m doing or my current interests.


  • wonder what criteria in his doggy brain compel him to select one spot rather than another at a given moment

    odd – i’ve often wondered this same thing about my dog..

    p.s. – loved the article – look forward to S-C in ’07

  • Wes says:

    It’s a good thing to wonder, Brian — dogs can be quite the enigmas. Also, thank you for catching a typo! And here’s hoping that SC continues to satisfy in the coming year. 🙂

  • Fauna says:

    Great article! I’ve got a few comments to add.
    1. I wasn’t watching Oprah in November, but the 14th’s episode sure as hell sounds sick.
    2. “The Trial” sounds like a great movie. I have to see it somehow.
    3. I agree with you on the Raven article. My younger sister seems to watch it, some how, but I’ve always found something wrong with it. Everyone is so stereotypical, and the stories are pointless. You had very good points in the article. [P.S., In one of the comments you quoted, some weirdo said “cracker”, which is actually a derogatory term directed at white people. ]
    4. Reading about Bacardi the dog, I have officially delacred he is awesome. I’d love to have a dog like him.
    That’s all. Good luck in 2007!

  • An Eskimo says:

    All 3 of the best/worst articles are great. For a second,though,I was wondering why a monster and an alligator are floating around…then I realized the point of it. Dumb me.

  • Wes says:

    Fauna: Yeah, that Oprah episode was pretty horrible — not that her average show is much better! The Trial, however, is fantastic, so you should definitely watch that if you get the chance. And you may want to rethink your desire for a dog like Bacardi, as the other day he snuck into my room (which he has never done before because he totally knows better) and got into a package of cookies. Sometimes Bacardi is an asshole.

    Eskimo: Don’t feel bad — it’s not like I explicitly called attention to the elements of the graphic or anything. I thought the representation of Pop Arena was particularly clever, though! 🙂

  • An Eskimo says:

    My best of the year and worst of the year:

    YTMND:Personally there are both funny people/quality site makers on there and assholes/spambots/people who add nothing new to a fad. And alot of terrible stuff came out of it that year. The only really good regular fad that happened was that thing where they made fake alternate universes,and now most of them are only OK.

    I’m in ur (blank) (blank)ing your (blank) jokes:Already they’re basically 2 months old and they’re old. And everybody else loves them. Oh sure,I took a picture of myself eating cereal and I added text saying “I’m in ur house eating ur cereal”. O RLY? isn’t NEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRLLLLYYYY as annoying.

    Snakes On a Plane: Big dissapointment. Instead of being like “Plan 9 from Outer Space” or “Santa Claus Conquers the Martians” where you can laugh at how bad it is,it just turned out to flat-out suck.

    X-Men 3:Why did Magneto survive like 258 needles of that stuff when other mutants basically passed out on floor because of 1 needle?

    Finding old video tapes of stuff I recorded:It just ends up being cool in one way or another.

    E/N sites: They’re really great,though I still don’t know what E/N stands for. Probably entertainment,though ent. would make more sense for that.

  • Wes says:

    Thanks for sharing, Eskimo! I must live under a rock, because I’d never even heard of the “I’m in ur blank blanking your blank” thing. And to respond to your concern, E/N stands for entertainment and nostalgia. 🙂

  • An Eskimo says:

    Thanks,and be glad you haven’t.

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