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Short fiction returns to Scary-Crayon with an all-new story entitled “The Lion That Wore Glasses”! Well, technically it’s an old story, but still. And no, the title’s not trying to be clever: it really is about a glasses-wearing lion. (1/20/08)
In a faraway land where everything is covered with mold, a lone scholar takes it upon herself to rid her town of the oppressive fungus. Read about her solitary exploits in an allegorical tale entitled “Mold Country”. (5/21/07)
In the long-awaited 14th edition of Crayon Poetry Corner, we sadly reflect upon an encounter with a flattened horny toad during a late night walk. Weep, dear readers, for it died so young… and with so much undone. (5/10/07)
Like the VA Tech shooter, Wes was also condemned for authoring “disturbing” works in college. In fact, this very excerpt was deemed so horrifying that the writing tutor avoided him at all costs after reading it! Srsly. (4/20/07)
Yes, it’s time for another short story! Well, sort of, as “The Native and the Foreigner” is more of a brief vignette that describes an uneasy foreigner’s initial interactions with his native host. Strange customs indeed… (4/4/07)
And here’s your holiday surprise — the final installment of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told! Okay, maybe it’s not much of a surprise, but still. And hey — even if you hate the story, at least now it’s over. (12/25/06)
The thirteenth part of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told again finds Santa Claus in the company of Wonrat and Rattoo as they debate the meaning of the winter holiday season. It’s deep and strange. (12/25/06)
If you’ve ever wondered what two giant, intelligent wharf rats would say to each other, you’ve come to the right place! The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told continues with the twelfth segment. Yay. (12/19/06)
Things are actually starting to wind down in the eleventh segment of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told. Who ever would have guessed that Santa would end up here? Nobody with a rational mind… (12/19/06)
If it were not a story, The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told would be too strange for words! But it is a story, and stories usually have words, so its strangeness takes the form of words. This is the tenth part. (12/19/06)
Scary-Crayon’s batshit insane holiday epic, The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told, just keeps getting stranger. The same goes for the images that accompany the text. The ninth part has goblin shark pics! (12/11/06)
And appropriately so — for if it were not, how could it rightly call itself The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told? In the eldritch eighth segment, among other things, we ponder the titles of various rooms. Yes. (12/11/06)
IS IT ABOUT CHRISTMAS YET, PA?!
The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told finally starts to live up to its holiday namesake as Santa steps up to take a definitive role in the seventh installment. The story’s still surpassingly strange, though! (12/11/06)
Anyone who claims that truth is stranger than fiction has obviously never read The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told! Here’s the spectacular sixth segment… in which things are still not making much sense. (11/26/06)
Considering that Santa Claus has entered the text, the fifth part of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told at last has a definite connection to the titular holiday! Ponder the mysteries of Kris Kringle within. (10/22/06)
Just when you never thought literature was beginning to make sense, The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told continues! In this freaky fourth installment, more crazy rambling takes place. Cling to your sanity. (9/19/06)
Spiders! Rumplestiltskin! Pac-Man! Werewolves! What do these creatures and characters have in common? They’re all mentioned in the third part of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told! Take your medicine. (9/4/06)
Yessiree, it’s time for the second engaging installment of The Absolute Strangest Christmas Story Ever Told. If you like reading odd and oddly insightful rambling nonsense, friends, you’ve come to the right place! (8/19/06)
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