Bits & Pieces

This has got to be the coolest train design ever.

THREE HORNS > ONE HORN

Even so, the horns aren’t the most striking feature of the Full Throttle Triceratops Ranger — it’s his wicked stylish jacket. Even without decent articulation, cool accessories, and a great price, this figure would be cool.  (12/6/09)

Run, Peri, run! In slow motion, if possible...

CHANGE IS NOT ALWAYS GOOD.

Rude, cruel, and needlessly violent, the sixth Doctor was easily the most loathsome of the character’s incarnations. As such, it’s almost fitting that the exclusive sixth Doctor regeneration figure is so disappointing.  (11/18/09)

"Make things go BOOOOOOOM!!!"

THROTTLE MAX RANGER GOLD!!!

We’ve been praising Power Rangers toys for over a year, but figures were largely absent from the site… until today! After reading our review of Throttle Max Ranger Gold, you too might become a Power Rangers fan.  (11/10/09)

He's got a *bone* to pick with you!

WOLF BREATH REVISITED!!!

In February 2008, we reviewed the Madballs Series 2 Wolf Breath — along with the other ‘balls in the series — in an advance review. We didn’t like him. But now that the toys are finally on shelves, our tune has changed!  (11/2/09)

He's gonna CUT YA!

THE EVIL BUZZSAW SAMURAI!!!

On the other hand, maybe he’s not all that evil! Admittedly, we at Scary-Crayon have very little information about the true personality of the Buzzsaw Samurai. We do, however, have a review of the Jazwares action figure!  (10/26/09)

Jon Pertwee as the third Doctor!

THE 3RD DOCTOR & DALEK SET!

Retro flavor abounds in our review of the new third Doctor and Dalek 2-pack! These overpriced figures aren’t perfect, but the target audience will eat them up… and perhaps get a mouthful of grease in the process.  (10/19/09)

Are you man enough to fight with him?

STREET FIGHTER IV GUILE!!!

When we think of Guile, three words immediately spring to mind: DISCIPLINE, JUSTICE, COMMITMENT! Yet while NECA’s SFIV Guile lacks that goofy charm (not to mention useful accessories), it’s still a great figure.  (10/12/09)

The strongest woman in the world will lightning kick your ass.

THE BEST CHUN-LI FIGURE YET.

Heck, aside from one glaring and pervasive problem and a few minor ones, NECA’s Street Fighter IV Chun-Li might even be the best possible Chun-Li action figure ever. Dig the photos — the toy really is fantastic.  (9/1/09)

On the cartoon, she even dated a vampire.

BLACK CAT IS ON THE PROWL!!!

What comic book superhero would be complete without a naughty temptress urging him to look the other way once in a while? No hero would willingly turn a blind eye to this Black Cat figure, though. She’s a hottie.  (8/6/09)

TEXT

HOT NEW TOYS FROM SDCC ’09!

Yes! But while there were tons of new toys on display at the 2009 San Diego Comic-Con, this article doesn’t cover them all — only the ones we want most. Read on for our five most-wanted toys unveiled at SDCC ’09.  (7/31/09)

Can't sleep... clown'll eat me

EVIL CLOWNS RIDE UNICYCLES.

As a typical dollar store toy, the Circus Figure on Unicycle doesn’t seem like much… but he is a clown, and we do so love the delightful horror of the painted smile! Run quickly, my children — this clown’s got wheels.  (7/7/09)

You should probably start running now.

THE JUNGLIEST PANDA EVER!!!

You’ve probably heard of the Kung Fu Panda, but there’s a pretty good chance you don’t know of the Jungle Panda. Thanks to guest author Ragey, however, you too can learn about the majesty of this absurd little beast.  (6/25/09)

Forty-thousand men and women every day...

~DON’T FEAR THE REAPER~

How does a toy that collapses into a broken pile of cheap dollar-store body parts right out of the package rise up to become one of the most entertaining figures ever?! I’ll tell you how: the Grim Reaper is magic.  (6/25/09)

TEXT

RUN AWAY IF YOU WANT TO LIVE

Okay, there’s no need to run from a toy — but in this review of the 6″ Terminator Salvation T-600 figure, we detail the reasons that you might want to hide your wallet when faced with this scaled-down cyborg.  (6/10/09)

Carnivore, carnivore, what do you eat?

WHEN TURTLEWOLVES ATTACK!!!

Playmates Toys is catching a lot of flack these days, but I remember a time when the company released some of the coolest — and zaniest — figures on the shelf. Exhibit A: Leo as the Wolfman from the old TMNT line!  (5/18/09)

Zim will conquer the filthy stink children... oh yes.

HUMAN DISGUISE INVADER ZIM…

…now holds the record for the fastest toy I have managed to break after removing it from the package: a whopping two (2!) seconds. That said, I hope you weren’t planning to read a favorable review! This one ain’t.  (3/1/09)

Reporter kicks the snot out of Foot Clan: film at 11.

APRIL, THE NINJA NEWSCASTER!!!

Yes, April O’Neil was an ace reporter… but she was also a skilled warrior! Yet while April, the Ninja Newscaster‘s got the moves to stomp the Foot, she could clearly use some extra training when it comes to fashion.  (2/2/09)

RIGHTEOUS

COURAGEOUS & RIGHTEOUS!!!

Besides the folks whose trademarks are being infringed upon, who doesn’t love knockoff toys? If you raised your hand, we bet the Courageous Righteous Bootleg Turtles will change your mind! They’re so… amazing.  (1/25/09)