January 12, 2009
The worst show ever and more Crayon Haiku!

We’re back! Didja miss us? 🙂

More Crayon Haiku this update, as today’s multipart installment features #104 through 107. I don’t have a whole lot more to say about these. The reference in the first one is to those McDonald’s apple pies (which technically cost 50 cents each, but they’re on the dollar menu), since I don’t think I’ve ever been able to eat one without burning the taste off of my tongue… which I guess means that I’ve never tasted one that wasn’t cold or reheated at home. Do they taste better fresh? I’m betting you don’t know either — those bastards are hot when they come off the… uh… heating trays? I don’t know what those things are called.

Also, I managed to replace my laptop’s fans without breaking anything, so I should be okay until something else needs replacing. And Grundy and Sinestro are here, meaning that next time we’ll add to the haiku total with the obligatory Legion of Doom update! YES! I’m still not optimistic that we’ll reach #200 by the end of the year, but #150 seems entirely possible.

Aaaand for more substantial content, there’s my review of the worst show I have ever seen. (In case you missed the warning on the content pages, the rather revolting screencaps likely make this article unsafe viewing for work.) I probably should have known what I was in for given that the Wiki entry for the entire series noted that “critically the show has been singled out for allegations of racism, misogyny, or just being wilfully puerile,” but I figured a British comedy couldn’t be that bad. I mean, a couple of my favorite comedies came out of the UK! Plus it had Shannen Doherty, and since I haven’t ordered those “Charmed” DVDs yet I needed my fix.

The show is seriously flipping awful. Also, I didn’t mention this in the article, but what I saw was apparently the fourth season of that godawful series. Delightful shows like “Pushing Daisies” are dead after two seasons — and intriguing shows like “Journeyman” perish after only one — whereas pure festering garbage like this lasts for freaking four seasons?! And in the same country that gave birth to “Doctor Who”?! Actually, “Doctor Who” has been pretty horrible lately, so maybe the UK’s doing a bit of backsliding. Things might improve once Barack Obama saves the global economy. Yes.

Also, Scary-Crayon’s anniversary is coming up on January 25, so feel free to click that donate button on the sidebar if you’ve enjoyed our content over the years! 😉 There’s also my Amazon.com wish list… and you could always submit an article! Or even a haiku, despite what I wrote in the submission guidelines. The haiku beast demands to be fed.

Until next time, Crayon fans!

-posted by Wes | 7:00 pm | Comments (6)
  • Jester says:

    How easy did you find the Grundy series? I found them all at a local Target…but they only had Sinerstro Corp Sinestro…no regular Sinestro. 🙁

    I guess I’ll have to complete Grodd via on-line shopping…I only ever found Supermen Blue/Red and Firestorm.

  • Wes says:

    Not easily at all! I never even saw the things until Black Friday… at a KB Toys, of all places. I’ve still never seen DCUC Wave 3 anywhere else. And even then I couldn’t find the Sinestro Corps. Sinestro (which was really the one I wanted, though I did see several mis-assembled regular Sinestros at one KB) — I had to rely on one of my fellow figure hunters for that one. But all’s well that ends well, right?

    DCUC Wave 2 was a bust for me too — all I ever saw were a single Black Manta (which I bought) and Blue Superman way back in May of last year.

    Also, I know how you feel about needing to complete a BAF online — I’ve got a very angry Red Hulk here threatening to smash up the place if he doesn’t get his right leg. I hate, hate, hate BAFs.

  • the Jax says:

    Another “oh no they didn’t” British show is the animated skit hellmouth of Monkey Dust. However, Monkey Dust is probably the most intelligent, most bitter gallery of satire I’ve ever seen. The Nick Park-esque wannabe terrorists are probably the most well-known characters.

  • Are BAFs those toys that come one piece at a time with other toys (I’m not much of a toy collector so I’m a little ignorant of the terminology)?

    Anyway, that show sounds absolutely dreadful! Unfortunately, that’s the kind of show that’s popular these days. I too, am disgusted by the way good shows die young while bad shows tend to last forever (while you hear everyone rave about how much they love them).

    I will admit, I like the idea of using masks to impersonate celebrities. But, It would work if the masks actually looked like the intended celebrity, and was accompanied by a well performed impersonation in a well-written skit.

    I am, however, starting to see the potential of “web shows”. I mean, many of them are starting to gain some recognition, and I’m certainly seeing how it would be good to have shows created without the tyranny of “networks”, “ratings”, and “target demographics”.

    Of course, there’s alot of crap on the net, too. But, the playing field seems far more even. Whereas on television, the cards are stacked against shows with so-called “limited appeal”.

  • Vyle says:

    I’ve not seen anything from Bo for ages, not since about 2002. I wasn’t a huge fan of it, but the thing about the impersonations is that they weren’t even trying to be anything like the celebrities. The point was to make the viewer wonder who the next celebrity to be vaguely impersonated would be.

    They would take 1 or 2 defining characteristics of somebody, then just do whatever came into their heads.

    For instance – Michael Jackson’s vague thriller era style costume + high pitched “whoo hoo”

    Ozzy’s shaky arms and mumbling.

    Craig David’s sharpie beard + ‘bo selecta’ catchphrase.

    The show itself wasn’t very funny, but not so much because of the bad impersonations (because they were never meant to be good…think Tommy Cooper’s magic, but with less charm) but because the rest of the content wasn’t that great.

  • morty says:

    your a dick

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