January 31, 2010
The Little Rabbit Who Wanted Red Wings!

'Allo 'allo, Crayon readers! We're back again with new content -- and it hasn't even been a month since the last update. How awesome is that?!

First, a quickie -- Dusty Plastic HELLside #12, which features Adora from "She-Ra: Princess of Power" facing off against Chun-Li of the Street Fighter series. More on Adora in a bit.

The more substantial offering in today's update is a summary review of The Little Rabbit Who Wanted Red Wings -- a book I've despised as long as I can remember. Admittedly, I don't really remember it before high school (I rediscovered it when perusing the selections on the bookshelf in my room), but still. This is also a piece that is somewhat personal, as I not only describe an incident from my own life but even include a relevant photo of myself. I'm not doing any of this for sympathy, mind you -- so please try not to offer your condolences or pity, though I welcome other responses and insights regarding today's features -- but I did want to share my own similar yet decidedly less encouraging experience in order to better convey just how wrong the events of this story are. I think we can all agree that The Little Rabbit Who Wanted Red Wings has a terrible message and probably shouldn't be shared with impressionable young minds in any context.

And back to Adora! The comic here is an extra photo from the shoot I did for my review of the figure at Articulated Discussion, so please check that out and leave a comment over there if you like. The review's not going over so well with some AD readers, as it's quite negative and contains a good amount of cursing (there are only 15 swear words in the 2000-word article, but even so), but I think readers familiar with some of my work over here might find it to be entertaining. If nothing else, it's given me material for a running gag involving Hordak... and a cool idea for a custom if I ever end up with a bunch of fodder from female figures. Oh, I also did last week's Bootleg Tuesday entry, so go there to marvel at the horror of bootleg toys based on a great late-90s cartoon show.

That'll do it for this update, then! Until next time --

-posted by Wes | 2:42 am | Comments (23)
23 Comments »
  • Anonymous says:

    Not to ruin anyone's childhood memories of this, from what i can tell horrible book about conforming to your parents wishes, nor to drag this down to the lowest common denominator.... but red wings is slang for going down on a girl with her period... the freudian implications are mind boggling.

  • Mickelodeon says:

    That's the first thing I thought of when I saw the title. Eww.

  • Matto says:

    Wow. What a disgusting children's book. It makes me feel dirty inside.

  • greybob says:

    You don't know horrific plastic surgery stories until you've seen former Korean pop-sensation and plastic surgeon addict Hang Mioku. Google for pictures if you dare: it's certainly not for the squeamish.

    • Wes says:

      WHAT. THE. BLOODY. HECK.

      You warned me, but I did not listen. Why did I not listen?!?!? I shall heed your warnings forevermore.

      Thanks for commenting, by the way! :)

      • greybob says:

        You're welcome! Hope it don't give you nightmares.

        Good article, by the way. Usually I find unintentional innuendo and questionable morals in children's books hilarious, but in this case that's just a horrible message to be telling kids. Also, it seems to be saying that personal exploration and the pursuit of self-fulfillment is wrong. Just be a good little rabbit like all the others! You don't need to be an individual to be loved, but if you're not like everyone else we'll slam the door in your face!

        The Twilight saga also seems to be sending some bloody disgusting messages to young girls.

        • Wes says:

          Yeah, from what I've read the messages in the Twilight series are pretty awful. It's bad enough that Bella's dating a much older man, but then she goes and makes him her world and has his baby at age 19? What about an education or a career?!

          But of course vampires don't need those things.

          • Leah says:

            Hmmm... can we hope for an article about the awfulness that is Twilight in the near future? Besides the one about the action figure, I mean.

    • SusO says:

      ergh.... i think that trumps the cat with no face 'chase no face'.

  • Brian says:

    hey wes.. - enjoyed the new piece.. - the story about your mother i found particularly unsettling and upsetting.. - that really sucks, man.. - i thought the blue hair looked pretty rad.. - i was going to say it reminded me of Stu from Rugrats but his was more purplish..

  • RADIX says:

    Children's books like these make me a sad stick. (So does the way your mom reacted to your blue hair)

    As I read your article, I wondered how the book would read if I were the author. His mother, instead of callously abandoning him, would simply ask him WHY he wished for red wings, when she thought he was fine the way he was; the others would advise him not to go any further than red wings the next time he had body issues. It would end with the Little Rabbit learning to come to terms with his own decisions and appearance (with some help from Mr. Groundhog, perhaps?), and keeping the damn wings.

    Of course, that version doesn't allow for the shallow woodland twits to get their comeuppance. ~RADIX

    • greybob says:

      If I was in charge of telling this story, it would go like this: the rabbit gets what he originally wanted. He wishes for a squirrel tail, and duck feet, and he'd keeping wishing for more and more parts of other animals until he was completely unrecognizable. Then it would MAKE SENSE for the mom to not recognize him and slam the door in his face. Heck, if I saw some sort of chimeric abomination I'd slam the door in any case.

      But no, they had to give him red wings that don't disfigure him in any way and are completely pimpin'. It makes me wonder if they went with red wings just so they could sneak a disturbing double entendre into the title. D:

  • DrNightmare says:

    How did I know your story would end with the rabbit becoming a sexy goth? Hah!

    Sexy tasty goth bunny stew, mmmm.

    I'd share some stories about my own adversities, but I'm sure it's nothing you haven't already experienced or could imagine, Wes, lol. And I add "imagine" because you know I'd most likely make them up. :P

  • L says:

    First look at the date this book was published. You cannot use modern day slang and meanings to interpret this treasured book which says, "be happy with who you are.' Additionally, your review would have been of more literary value had you not interspersed it with profanity.

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