
Actually, that exclamation point above should probably be replaced by a period or ellipses, as A Crayon Haiku #84 takes its cue from my latest action figure disappointment. C’mon, Hasbro — it’s called quality control. (11/19/08)
The Tekken series wasn’t saturated with zany characters, but it definitely had its share of odd combatants. As seen in A Crayon Haiku #83, I’m now attempting to immortalize one of them with a custom figure. (11/11/08)
What do Rupert Giles, Samuel Anders, and Tommy Oliver have in common? What is the connection between the White and Black Dino Rangers? These burning questions receive answers in A Crayon Haiku #82! (10/8/08)
“Wolverine and the X-Men” will be hitting Nicktoons in 2009, but in the meantime he’s starring solo in his very own Crayon Haiku! We think he’s a bit overdressed for the occasion, but are you gonna tell him that?! (7/29/08)
In A Crayon Haiku #80, we welcome an awesome new addition to the action figure collection. Pink elephants may be feared by some people, but here at Scary-Crayon we love them… even if they’re not what you covet. (7/18/08)
Thanks to the divine forces of randomness and impulse, the ad pictured in A Crayon Haiku #79 finally makes its amazing debut! Which really isn’t so much amazing as it is disturbing. People got paid to make this? (5/13/08)
And they just keep on coming! The Legion of Doom gains yet another evil member in A Crayon Haiku #78. There’s yet another bonus haiku as well, though this one is about things lost rather than gained. So sad. (5/13/08)
Heroes, heroes, whatcha gonna do… whatcha gonna do when the Legion of Doom comes for you?! Behold the state of the wicked team in A Crayon Haiku #77 — along with a bonus Salvation Run-related haiku. (5/1/08)
In A Crayon Haiku #76, Jimmy rightfully blasts Clark for rejecting Chloe on “Smallville”. Sure, it’s the Silver Age Jimmy Olsen figure and Clark hasn’t actually become Superman on the show, but it’s still a valid jab. (4/7/08)
Do you realize that three of the last five haikus have been about Grodd? Including this one, make that four out of the last six — ’cause that evil man-eating ape is back again in A Crayon Haiku #75! Fear the super-gorilla. (3/18/08)
We’re convinced that “Smallville” is the worst live-action show based on a comic book superhero to date — that JLA pilot can’t be worse — yet we’ve still been watching it lately. Why, you ask? The answer is simple. (3/3/08)
Why does the DC universe have so many gorillas?! In A Crayon Haiku #73, we see the latest Kong destined to join the ranks of our DC roster. It’s only a matter of time before we get to Solovar and the Ultra-Humanite. (2/26/08)
Yes, Gorilla Grodd is back AGAIN… and in A Crayon Haiku #72, he’s brought something with him! Could this be the beginning of a Legion of Doom plot to subdue humanity through germ warfare? We certainly hope not! (2/14/08)
Grodd proves that you can’t keep an evil gorilla down — and that, like in comic books and on Super Friends, his appearance has been known to change considerably — in A Crayon Haiku #71. I love the purple cape. (1/30/08)
Animals attack in A Crayon Haiku #70! Gorilla Grodd’s not devouring hostages or hurling cars through buildings this time around, but he’s still a pretty dangerous customer… especially if you’re a member of the fairer sex. (1/29/08)
In the last haiku, we saw the DC heroes defeated by an evil new member of the toy collection. Today, we learn that he is not alone! Together… just the two of them… they will discover the secret of the anti-life equation. (1/25/08)
The formerly hero-centric (sorta; the ‘zarro twins mean well!) DC Comics action figure collection of Scary-Crayon is rocked by the arrival of its latest addition in A Crayon Haiku #68. Let the universe howl in despair! (1/18/08)
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again — it is really difficult to write four lines about the contents of a three-line haiku without rendering actually reading the poem unnecessary. A Crayon Haiku #67 has a dinosaur in it. Sorta. (9/7/07)