Hey, hey, we’ve got some new content for you today! Yes. First up, Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #112 — in which we see that two stars from Capcom’s Versus games have been counting calories. I was a fan of the initial Spider-Man Juggernaut that Hasbro released, but I’m even more partial to this redeco — something about the reddish brown and the yellow belly just works for me. That said, both Juggies seemed a tad undersized for the character, so I had to poke a bit of fun at that! And of course I’ve lamented the lack of massive thighs on SOTA’s Chun-Li since the figure came out — that was probably the main reason I didn’t buy it until much, much later. Even though NECA’s Chun looks a bit freakish, I’m looking forward to getting her… even though she’ll make poor Juggernaut look even smaller. Which of course I might have to revisit in another comic. 🙂

Speaking of the comics, I’m (once again) considering changing the name. I’d originally gone with Hot Flash because it seemed like a quick flame burst — as opposed to the full HELL comics — but the full name does seem a bit long. What do you think of Dusty Plastic Limbo or Dusty Plastic Purgatory? Names along those lines would suggest the floating nature of the comics (I regard them as sort of filler in between the more substantial pieces on the site) while avoiding any unflattering associations generated by the term “Hot Flash.” And if you’ve got any other suggestions, I’d like to hear them!

Next up, another toy review — this time of the Circus Figure on Unicycle! Of course, the figure in question is really a CLOWN, which is the primary reason for the review. We love clowns here, yes we do. If you love them too, there’s a “blank” one-shot comic to which you can add your own dialogue and/or exposition! w00t!

Finally, I’ve got a guest It Figures comic over at Poe Ghostal’s site that I encourage y’all to check out. Poe’s always got great toy news — particularly when it comes to Mattel’s MOTUC and DCUC lines — so if that interests you you should be sure to visit at other times, too. 🙂

And that’s all for now! Next time, I’ll have another comic for you — whether it’ll be a Hot Flash or feature another name remains to be seen. There’ll be a new Spectare summary review in the near future as well (though perhaps not in the very next update), so be on the lookout for that! Ja!

Yep! Today’s Hot Flash comic references Prowl’s noble sacrifice in the Season 3 finale of “Transformers Animated”… as well as Jazz’s highly unfortunate role in the first live-action Transformers film. No, I haven’t seen the sequel yet. And no, given how much I despised the first film and what I’m hearing about the second, I’m in no hurry whatsoever to do so.

‘Till all are one.

So! New Hot Flash today. Remember when I wrote in the Classic TV Toys Grim Reaper review that the guy was toy comic gold? Well, I wasn’t kidding — this is only the first of many humorous visits from our skull-headed friend. He won’t feature in the next few Hot Flashes (yes, for once I’ve actually got advanced content queued up!), but he will definitely be back. Mark my words.

Yeah… moving on. If you missed that Michael Jackson Hot Flash I cleverly hid away to avoid any flaming in the immediate wake of his death, you can check that out! It does poke fun at the guy, though, so be warned if you’re an ultra-sensitive Chris Crocker LEAVE MICHAEL ALONE HE’S A (dead) HUMAN BEING kinda person. And speaking of recent features, don’t forget to read Ragey’s Jungle Panda review! If you haven’t already!

And that should just about do it for today’s entry, right? No — there’s one more important thing, which you probably haven’t noticed because it’s so subtle. Take a moment to scroll on up to the navigation header, won’t you? I’ll wait.

…

…

<elevator music plays>

…

Back? Didja see it? NO?!?!? Fine, I’ll tell you — the site navigation has been changed up a bit! See, for a while I’ve been dumping toy reviews into the Miscellaneous Articles category… and while that worked fine when we were only doing one every six months or so, the recent onslaught of them has prompted me to give them a separate category. However, because I didn’t want to mess with the right-side SC graphic(s) — and because it’s been ages since I posted an installment of Crayon Poetry Corner — I decided to merge the CPC and Writing sections. w00t.

Aaand because that changed the alignment of the text, and since I didn’t have or couldn’t find a lot of the old files I used, it also meant that I had to completely redo all of the left header graphics. I’m not even going to tell you how long it’s taken me, but suffice it to say that I’ve been staring at code and graphics and little grey and darker grey boxes that indicate transparency for so long that I’ve temporarily (temporarily?) gone quite mad. Hence the rather punchy nature of this entry! Oh ho ho ho ho.

And this is why Madballs and a Squirtdevil are swarming the Juggernaut.

P.S. If you’ve been using a RSS feed reader to keep up with the blog and have been swarmed by the gross anti-hotlinking graphic, let me know! I’ve fixed it for Google Reader and Bloglines, and at the very least you should be able to view the emoticons without having to see poor Raph partially submerged in a cow patty… but if you’re using another feed reader, let me know so I can fix things for you too. Not that I post all that many images in the blog, but still — if you’re legitimately trying to keep up with the site, you shouldn’t be subjected to that. 😛

Considering the blow(s) dealt to the pop culture world yesterday, it’s a bit ironic that I posted a Grim Reaper figure review early that morning, eh?

Anyway, I generally like to leave more time in between updates to allow y’all to catch up, but here’s a special Hot Flash to mark the passing of one Michael Jackson. The image itself is kinda fitting, but if you click it you get the snarky dialogue that prompted me to make the comic in the first place (well, I imagined Michael Jackson saying that upon entering his own personal version of Heaven)… so you might not want to if you really loved Jacko and are easily upset by people making fun of him (especially now that he’s gone). For my part, I didn’t know him and he didn’t know me — and he hadn’t put out any really great songs since the 80s, so it’s not like I’m being deprived of any awesome new music — so I’m not really saddened by his death. I’d be sadder if you died, since right now, simply by reading this, you are closer to me than Michael Jackson ever was.

Also? The guy was a child molester, or at least did some really inappropriate shit with children. How do I know this? The guy talked about sharing his bed with children on national television — no, international television — without appearing to even remotely grasp how that would be perceived. “What’s wrong with sharing your bed?” You just don’t fucking do it, that’s what’s wrong with it — if for no other reason than your own goddamned protection. And he said this long after he’d already paid off some other family accusing him of touching their little boy!

Shit, if something like that happened to me I would never be seen in the presence of children again. Nor would I calmly dismiss any accusations concerning or references to the incident as stemming from “ignorance.” No, my response would be more along the lines of, “FUCK YOU I DIDN’T TOUCH THAT MOTHERFUCKING KID AND IF YOU EVER SAY I DID AGAIN I WILL FUCKING SMASH YOUR JAW AND RIP OUT YOUR FINGERNAILS.” Michael Jackson’s attitude towards the whole thing was never that of an innocent man — it was more like that of a guilty man who didn’t understand what was wrong with what he’d done. And while that is in itself is a kind of innocence, my point stands.

So… yeah. Oh, you might notice that this comic isn’t linked on the front page — that’s mostly because I want Ragey’s awesome Jungle Panda review to occupy the top spot on the site for at least a few more days, but also because I don’t want people just popping in, seeing it, and then coming here to flame the crap out of me. They’re going to have to go a little deeper into the site for that. 😛

‘Till next time!

It’s time once again for new articles. w00t! That’ll do for an introduction. 😛

First up, a guest piece from Ragey of Random Action Hour (part of the Random Hoo Haas network of awesome stuff). As a fellow connoisseur of freakish bootleg toys, Ragey has graced the site with a review of a Jungle Panda action figure! Who or what is Jungle Panda, you ask? You’ll have to read the review to find out in depth… but let’s just say that he’s Kung Fu Panda’s unhinged and malnourished cousin from the jungles of Myops.

We’ve also got a review of the Mad Monsters Series 2 Grim Reaper figure from Classic TV Toys. I really, really like this toy — no, love this toy — and yet I should probably strongly dislike it for at least one major reason. Instead, Daddy Death’s got me fawning over him and almost set to dive headlong into another toy obsession not unlike the Power Rangers figure kick that I still haven’t written about. Why didn’t anyone tell me these things were so bloody much fun?!

And then there’s the 109th installment of Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash. You may recall an old Crayon Haiku in which Hellboy was shown wearing an oversized coat — well, thanks to Clobberin’ Time Thing and whatever weird occurrences led to this old figure appearing recently on the toy shelves at Ross, Hellboy now has a more fitting garment! I almost feel bad for Thing, though… in addition to losing his jacket, he lost his batteries because that sound effect was getting on my bloody nerves. 🙁

The other comics have appeared elsewhere but not previously on SC, so I include them as an excuse to plug other sites and such. I mentioned that Toy Bender contest a while back — well, Beverly Crusher was the figure that I won. Hurrah! And the Optimus and Prowl comic comes from a guest review that I did of Samurai Prowl over at Articulated Discussion. It’s Transformers Week over there, so be sure to visit and check out all of the fun (or not-so-fun, in the case of Prowl) Transformers content!

And while we’re plugging other sites, you should really visit Geek Creek by Monte Williams! He apparently goes to a local canyon and takes cool photos of action figures in natural settings — very cool stuff, even if pics like that destroyed Animated Megatron cause me to wince in pain. Monte also writes about pop culture and other miscellany on Retrobate and the Lowbrow Literati column on PopMatters, so check those out too.

Aaaaaaand that’s all I’ve got for now! Expect more Hot Flash comics next time, since I was serious when I said that about Grim. Grim’s a bloody toy comic goldmine.

THREE NEW ARTICLES!!! Seriously, when was the last time that happened? (And when will it happen again?! Who bloody knows?!)

Anyway, first up we have the latest installment of Mickey Glitter’s Sarah Jane Smith Fashionista Fever! (which is also crossposted on Strange Cousin Susan, the online home of our coruscating contributor)! While Mickey’s favorite time-traveling journalist — she can only be my second favorite; if you stood still, April O’Neil totally appeared on screen in all of the levels of Turtles in Time on the SNES — may have lost whatever fashionista flavor she’d acquired in previous appearances, at least we get to read Mickey’s amusing criticisms of such items as translucent pink macks and desperation-soaked Andy Pandy overalls. Perhaps Mickey would’ve been less harsh if Sarah Jane had donned a bright yellow jumpsuit and white boots instead? 😉

Next, an honest-to-goodness Foodstuffs article: a review of MolliCoolz Incredible Ice Cream Beads. I really don’t like these things, which actually made me kinda sad after I visited the MolliCoolz website and found it to be so infectiously delightful. Okay, it was mostly the exuberant (!) MolliCoolz spokeswoman who I found to be delightful… but still. Given my tendency to leave multiple tabs open, however, she did start to get on my nerves after a while! I mean, as much as I love your accent, darlin’, I don’t need you simultaneously giving me three different MolliCoolz pitches and/or nagging me about not clicking around while I’m scouring the interwebs in an attempt to find out if elephants have ever been documented eating meat. (I haven’t found anything yet to indicate that they have, though apparently hippos will consume animal flesh in rare circumstances.)

And lastly, there’s my review of Terminator Salvation. I’m pretty sure I would have disliked the movie even if I hadn’t seen and loved “Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles”, but that a television show — and a canceled one at that 👿 — managed to be so superior to this film, what with its overpaid “A-list” actors and bigtime Hollywood screenwriters and whatnot just irks me. Christian Bale needs to flip out on himself for reading this movie’s script and still agreeing to do it. Money cannot buy back dignity, Bale-san. (more…)

Indeed! So this is probably the largest update we’ve had in quite a while, though two out of three of today’s features aren’t insanely substantial (though hopefully they are a tiny bit amusing). First up, Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #108 — which actually features three one-panel comics rather than the usual one. Does anybody remember the Wuzzles, or is it really just me? And thanks again to TAO of Articulated Discussion for the Captain Cold figure, which I won in his contest for April! w00t!

One of these days I’m gonna have a contest over here, though I doubt I’ll give away anything half as cool as a Legion of Doom member. As seen in today’s installment of A Crayon Haiku — which covers #132-135 — that brings me just two members away from completing the team! I’ll probably end up eBaying a DC Direct Cheetah, but I’m kinda torn about what to do for Giganta. I’m not really serious about keeping Ginormica on the team for the long haul… at least not without some customization. And speaking of customization, you can see my mostly complete Foot ninja custom in ACH #132! The base figure was obviously a Spectacular Spider-Man figure, but I also did some sculpting on him. I’ll give a full rundown of the process once I’ve truly finished him. Oh, and Shockwave. SHOCKWAVE. I initially disliked the toy, but now I kinda like him. Perhaps that $20 refund had something to do with it!

And then we’ve got our more substantial offering for today — a review of Playmates Toys’s Terminator Salvation T-600 figure! I actually kinda like the guy, but if I were giving out numerical scores I’d probably have to give him a 6/10 on the collector scale. If you’re at all interested in getting him, though, he’s probably worth picking up. (more…)

I really don’t have a lot to add about today’s article — a review of The Story of Frankenstein, Dracula, and the Wolfman — and since it’s late and I’m really hot (temperature-wise, I mean) I’ll keep this brief. Please let me know what you think of the review, and definitely share your thoughts if you own this CD or order it following my recommendation! It really is a fun listen, and while it wasn’t what I expected in terms of content, it definitely exceeded my expectations in terms of quality. Heck, for $1, it could’ve gotten away with being much, much worse.

Until next time! 😈

So here’s that horror-themed figure review I mentioned way back in March — Leo as the Wolfman from the old Playmates TMNT line! Like I say in the article, he’s pretty much everything you’d expect from a Turtles toy circa 1993, but he’s a freaking Ninja Turtle werewolf. That’s just awesome. By the way, I didn’t draw that Leo image for the review — I’ve had that on hand since 2004, when I drew disembodied and heavily stylized heads of the Monster Turtles for no apparent reason. Check ’em out:

Oh, and for newcomers (or longtime readers who want to revisit a classic Foodstuffs entry), the Turtle Troll image linked in the article came from our old Turtle Spew piece. I really should do another food article sometime, eh? Those were always fun. 🙂 And speaking of updates, note the additions to the blog comments — you can now reply directly to other commenters and receive e-mail notifications (if you so choose, that is) when people respond to what you’ve written. Woo.

Finally, I’d like to call your attention to a new addition to the links block: Articulated Discussion! Whenever I get a button for it, the awesome haven of bootleg toys known as The Undiscovered Playthings should be getting a link as well. And while we’re mentioning new sites (or at least sites that are more/less new to us), we should take a moment to remember the sites that are leaving or have already left us. Warehouse 8, which was a really cool UK-based gaming site, appears to have fallen off the face of the Internet, and our pal SAG of superarticulated.com has decided to seek gold and adventure in the world beyond that of toys and figure reviews. We wish him — and the webmasters of Warehouse 8, wherever they may be — the very best!

And yes, we are aware that the Pop Arena link is also dead — I fully expect it to return just as suddenly as it vanished. We miss you, Pop Arena!

I believe the next article will include more monsters, so do join us for that. Until then… 😈

Hard to believe (or not…) that it’s been over a month since the last SC update, but we’re finally back with a new piece! Despite my initial recognition that the show wasn’t very good, I’ve continued watching “Dollhouse”… and I can’t say that it’s gotten better. In fact, I now think I hate the show, mostly because it liberally embraces one of the things I despise most in any work: pseudo-philosophical bullshit. This mainly consists of shallow ideas and pronouncements masquerading as deep ones, but it’s also a problem when multiple characters advance ideas that are clearly wrong and/or questionable… yet even when these ideas are voiced to other characters who would presumably know enough to point out their flaws, nobody else calls them out. Actually, that last one is a problem even when they’re not talking about things like mind-erasing technology and eternal life, but whatever.

I doubt that we’ll have another April update, but hopefully I’ll have more content for you before another month has passed! Seeya then.

I meant to get these up late on Friday the thirteenth, but I got a bit distracted by some much-needed sleep. Oh well, I suppose it’s still SPOOKY DAY on the West Coast, eh? I hope nothing bad happens to y’all out there in the remaining hours.

Anyway, lots of Crayon Haiku this update! I finally found Juggernaut, and it’s fitting that the Willow figure I ordered earlier arrived on Friday the thirteenth, what with her being a witch. Still, she’s no match for Mr. Marko.

The lack of content this week can also be explained by another distraction — customizing! After seeing the New York Comic Con pics of Playmates’ rather unfortunate Shredder, I got it into my head to make my own… and not even the news that NECA’s awesome comic Shredder will be released couldn’t deter me from this task. But it’ll look quite a bit different from the NECA version, what with the Super Shredder armor and quite different color scheme (right now I’m thinking black with purple highlights), so it’s not like I’ll be tempted to retire mine because NECA’s shows up. Heck, NECA’s will probably show up before I’ve finished. Look how long I’ve taken (and continue to take) with poor Wolverine!

Last weekend’s debut of “Power Rangers RPM” was kinda weak — and I absolutely hate the theme song — but at least the figures look pretty good alongside the Doctor and crew!

And yes, Bacardi uses a litterbox. Mostly. He’s a lot like a cat.

Anyway, even though Friday the thirteenth is over, I’m not satisfied with missing an update — so to make it up to you, I’m planning a couple of horror-themed articles in the near future. And another figure review, since I got this toy today that I really want to open, but I can’t do that until I take in-package pictures and whatnot. He’s small and I know nothing about him, so hopefully it’ll be a quick piece.

And then the Power Rangers figure roundup. Jungle Fury figures may not be around by the time I get to it… so if you’re on the fence and you happen upon one of those Jungle Master 4-packs at TRU (which is how I was finally able to get the Yellow and Wolf Rangers, even though it left me with doubles of the Red and Blue Rangers), flipping get it. They’re cool figures, and at $5 each (the set is $20), they’re quite the bargain.

Okey-doke, seeya next time. 🙂

I’d made up my mind to write this piece on “Dollhouse” even before I saw this Penny Arcade comic — largely because of people just like the ones Tycho mentioned in the attendant blog post. Well, not quite… the people who bother me most aren’t the ones who watch out of slavish devotion to Joss Whedon, but rather the ones whose slavish devotion to him leads them not only to blame FOX for any shortcomings the show exhibits at this point, but also to insist that the show will necessarily improve because hey, it’s a Joss Whedon show! Given that these are also the same people who view any negativity or criticism towards their beloved media as “spoiling their fun,” I admittedly derive some small pleasure in doing just that. 😉

Also — in case you couldn’t tell — I’ve been making a conscious effort to include less swearing and objectionable content in recent reviews. I’m not sure why, really (after all, this is a site that still features photos of bubbly phlegm loogies, not to mention a cartoonish image of Wolverine giving Nightcrawler a handjob), but here’s an excerpt from the original draft of today’s article before I decided to clean it up:

I almost feel bad for the guy — unless you’re spectacularly egotistical (and I tend to think Whedon is, though I have no concrete basis for that assumption), having throngs of smarmy fanboys typing “HALLELUJAH!” in response to your every creative effort has to not only get old after a while, but also really make you question whether your work is, in fact, good. If thousands of people in a given community had barely taken a breather from sucking your balls (or, for female readers, your… toes) for years on end, you’d start to doubt the veracity of their claims that your testes tasted like strawberry banana milk. After all, when was the last time they’d been able to enjoy a cool glass of the stuff? And even if they did acquire some — say, from you — would they even be able to taste it?

I’ve been drinking strawberry banana milk lately, see. It is quite delicious. Far better than balls, I’d wager.

Also, we’ve got two new haiku! Many thanks to Ken for supplying the image (which also appears here on his DeviantArt account). Ken also runs a toy blog, Figured Out, so be sure to check that out as well.

And I guess that about wraps it up for this entry! As always, thanks for reading. See you next time!

It feels like it’s been forever, but we’ve got a new review to kick off March — Human Disguise Invader Zim! While I bought this a couple of years ago with a few other clearance figures, I only recently got around to opening it. I kinda wish I hadn’t, though, as it seemed a lot cooler while it was still in the package! Now, until I break down and get the DVD set, my last memory of Invader Zim will be an unpleasant one.

On the other hand, the second season of the show kinda sucked, so maybe that would have been the case no matter what.

In other news, while we have no new Crayon Haiku for you today, we encourage you to check out HAIKU for lots of… well, haiku. Also, SWAFT — run by our friend Tresob Yr — is apparently in the process of making a hosting change. I’ll get the links changed when that’s all complete and finalized, but do remember to check the site out over there! The subject of Charlie Clone’s latest review (revue?) is kinda unsettling.

I’ve still got that Power Ranger figure roundup in the works, but before then I might go for a Spectare review or two. If I do, it’ll come fairly soonish — we’ve gone exactly two weeks without any content, so I’m not averse to doubling (or even tripling, ha ha) up this week! But, as always, we’ll see if that actually comes to pass.

Until next time!

It’s been a while since we’ve had a feature like this, eh? Angry criticism abounds in this review of Beyoncé’s terrible new song, “Diva”! The article pretty much says all I’ve got to say about it, but really — ugh. Beyoncé should be ashamed of herself for this crap.

Of course, the public is lovin’ it. I hate the world.

And here’s that aforementioned retro toy review: a closer look at April, the Ninja Newscaster! Or whenever Ridiculous outfit aside, the figure’s as good as any other April Playmates has ever released — and is far hotter than all of them, including even the 2007 movie April. That may not be saying much (that figure is so not cute), but Movie III April is admittedly a strong contender in the attractiveness department.

Also, note the screencap of April from the Genesis version of TMNT: Tournament Fighters that appears in the article (as well as the modified image on the content pages, which I really love) — yeah, I actually had to play the game to get that. Which means that you totally owe me. That game was bloody awful, which makes even less sense in light of the undeniable fact that the SNES version was pure awesome.

More figure reviews to come!

Hey all! As the topic says, we’ve got even more Crayon Haiku for you today, but first, an apology: I totally meant to have another article up to commemorate the site’s fifth anniversary, but then I got bogged down and kinda didn’t get that done. Also, admittedly, I was so pleased with the Scary Faces piece that I was hesitant to knock it off of the top spot. I really do like that article!

Anyway, here are three more haiku! Today is Lis Sladen‘s birthday, so we wanted to mention that given the love that Scary-Crayon and frequent contributor Mickey Glitter of Strange Cousin Susan exhibit for one Sarah Jane Smith. Apparently Hulk loves Sarah Jane, too! And then there’s a quick haiku mentioning my newfound love of Power Rangers figures. Expect more of them to show up on the site in the near future, as well as possible Jungle Fury episode reviews. Suffice it to say that that show is at least fifteen times better than it has any right to be. I’m hooked.

All for now, then. You know better than to set your watch based on release dates that I mention here in the SC blog, but I’m hoping to have another article done for tomorrow or Tuesday. It’ll be a retro toy review that is kinda sorta appropriate given what’s recently appeared on the pegs at Targets across the country. You know what I’m talking about. 🙂

Hidey-ho, minna-san! You didn’t think we’d let the site’s fifth anniversary pass without comment, did you? Yes, it’s been five years since we first opened our virtual doors on January 25, 2004. (Much of the early site content was online since 2003, though, and some people were able to access it via Google… so technically Jax is correct.) I wasn’t sure I’d still be doing the site in five years, but here I am! Will Scary-Crayon still be around in 2010? Let’s hope it survives in some shape or form.

Anyway, before we break out the party hats, mea culpas on my part — I don’t have nearly as much content ready as I’d hoped to have to mark the occasion. That said, I’m going to post what we’ve got now and keep working throughout the day to get as much as I can up! I’m going to try to get at least one more article up today, two if I can, and three if I’m really good. If I only get one up, expect the second one tomorrow, with the third to follow sometime later in the week. If I get two up, expect the third to follow later in the week. And if I get all three up… I’ll be damned impressed with myself. In any case, there will be more content later in the week, so you can call this a week-long SC celebration if you like. 🙂

First things first — more haiku! With A Crayon Haiku #111 through 117 hitting today, it’s looking more and more likely that we’ll be able to break 200 by the year’s end. I mean, we’re almost to #120 and has a fifth of the year passed? Nope! Most of these haiku are self-explanatory, but let’s give Deep Dive Batman and Jax some love for being awesome. ‘Cause they both are. One is an action figure, one is a human being, but still. Awesome. Thanks for the scary lightswitch cover, Jax! And there’s also a “baby picture” of SC in there — that is, a screencap of the one of the earliest SC layouts, which I painstakingly (not really, though it did take a tiny bit of work since my old files were all over the place) restored from my old files specifically for today. Call it digitally remastered! I think things look way better today, though admittedly I’ll always have a soft spot for the drab maroon and grey. If I ever get my own residence, I’ll have to paint a room with opposing maroon and grey walls. 🙂

Aaaand back to mentions of awesome people, Mickey Glitter is back with Sarah Jane Smith Fashionista Fever! Part 4! I’m always glad to host guest articles on the site, and one of the highlights of 2008 for me and SC was having Mickey grace the site with her wit, writing skill, and curious obsession with Sarah Jane’s footwear. Thanks a bunch, Mick — here’s hoping for encore features involving “The Sarah Jane Adventures”! 😀

Alrighty, that’ll do us for now — hopefully I’ll have more in a few hours, In which case I will simply update this post. TTFN!

UPDATE: Well, that took a bit longer than expected, but here’s the review of the Courageous Righteous Bootleg Turtles. It’s still a little rough and needs to be checked for typos, but that takes time and I wanted it up now! So if you see some, mention them in the comments for bonus points or something. 😉

And now (after I get the front and content pages updated, anyway) it’s back to work to see if I can’t get another article up! Doesn’t look like it’ll be ready before midnight for those of you on the East Coast, but it just might make it for West Coasters. In any case, while these TMNT bootlegs are pretty awesome, believe me when I say that the best — and weirdest — is yet to come.

UPDATE: So I didn’t make it in time for the West Coasters, but here it is: a review of the greatest coloring book of all time. I really love this book, and I seriously feel proud to have posted this article. Is that weird? I think it’s weird. I almost never feel proud, but today’s articles have stirred those feelings in me.

Happy anniversary, Scary-Crayon. I love you, you inanimate, eldritch online chronicle of random wackiness. And you too, faithful readers! Scary-Crayon spreads love for all. <3

Except, of course, stuff that it doesn’t love.

Yep! Expect more substantial content on (or at least shortly after) Scary-Crayon’s upcoming 5th anniversary, but in the meantime we’ve got A Crayon Haiku #108-110 and Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #107. I may have finally been able to complete Grundy, but — as you can see — I’m not having much luck finding the final piece needed to complete Red Hulk! But at least he’s got that Ang Lee movie Hulk for support. 🙂

The bit with Frodo and Spike (who contains parts from two different Spike figures; neat, eh? Eh? 😉 ) stems from the fact that Frodo’s talking base only says one thing… and the one thing it says is kinda odd. Frodo not only mention Samwise by name — which might have been cooler if the base had come with a Frodo/Sam 2-pack — but also does so in this really breathy voice. Like they’re about to submit to prurience and reenact their favorite scenes from hobbit slash fanfiction right there atop Mount Doom with Gollum possibly looking on. Hey, he’s a hobbit, right? Threesome!

And now for something completely different.

In keeping with today’s historic inauguration, there’s the obligatory patriotic nod in the 110th haiku. And expect a full review of Freedom the American Eagle at some point! All proceeds from the sale of that figure went to benefit the families of 9/11 victims, which I guess means they didn’t fare too well since I got the figure on clearance for $2.99. Yay America?

See y’all next time.